"If our single, all-embracing passion is to make much of Christ in life and death, and if the life that magnifies Him most is the life of costly love, then life is risk, and risk is right. To turn from it is to waste your life." --John Piper
To explain the things going through my mind this week would make this post end up being entirely long. So instead, I've decided to just post a poem explaining myself. It's rather choppy, and it doesn't flow all that well, but I'm too lazy to edit it. It's alright for now.
'Worth Fighting For'
"It's always been easy to run alone
And only stop to help a friend who falls
It's easy to block out any other wounded man's groans
It's easy to ignore a stranger who crawls.
It's easy to ignore it all,
And keep at my run
At least until God breaks me down to a crawl
Then it all comes crashing down, with the simple fact that I am not done.
I am not done with my past
From my knees I look back
To the sorrow and pain that still lasts
I realize the love I lack.
I lack the love to see my family who was in darkness and at war,
I've blocked out their screams and cries
To me, all that mattered was that I was sore
To me, all that mattered was my battle of lies.
In my heart, to my core, it's always been about me
It's always been about my sin to kill
All that mattered was whether or not I could be freed.
But now with brokenness, my Commander has me filled.
As I get up, my body is shaking,
My friends are screaming at me to press on
They know I'm not faking
But I know to turn forward and run away is wrong.
Running back to pick up the pieces of my past
Gathering up all the hurt and pain
I commit myself to putting it in words that will last
No longer will I be afraid to be caught in the rain.
I've never known someone so selfish as me
Who did their best to throw everything away
I refuse to let everything just be
I will not stop till it is all out on the tray.
My broken self keeps me p and fighting
I see a need, and out of my heart the lessons learned pour
Because now I know what's worth writing
Because there are people worth writing for.
I don't care if everyone is telling me to leave it
I'm not stopping while there are people dying
So I'm gathering every bit
And not giving up trying.
I won't let anyone tell me it's not worth it
I won't let them say it's just a chore
Because in truth, they're worth every bit
Because in truth, people are out there worth fighting for."
Yeah...I feel like I could have done better. But I am going to leave it there for now.
Finished my first Christian Fantasy this last week; at least I finished enough of it that I could give it to three people to look over and critique for me. Praise God He brought me through it!
Was a hard story to work on; but I finally kept a promise to a dear friend, and I finally got everything out concerning the subject my story was on.
Now I am working on two other story ideas.
One story is a Steampunk zombie book. ((Which will require a fair amount of research, which will be tough and take a long time, so that might take longer)).
The second is another Christian Fantasy. The theme for this one is depression. ((Have so many ideas, but now it's just a matter of putting them together. Lord willing, I will be able to do that soon.))
I really want to work on the second; I wish I could think of a strong story for this one, and put it into the right world.
Right now, at this point in my life I have so much I want to say about depression and rejection; it's only a matter of finding the right words.
I keep reminding myself that I need a place to bleed. I need to gather my thoughts; and let them out into something that makes sense.
There are so many reasons I want to write a story with the theme of depression.
I think it would be good for me to do right now; it would be a constant reminder to me in my own life. Perhaps writing it would be good for me.
I need to bleed a bit.
So, the weekend killed my inspiration and motivation for writing. One poor weekend, and just like that I'm spiraling downwards. Weekends do tend to kill me like this, but I was doing alright until this one.
I barely ever write when I am inspired. I always follow that quote by, who was it? Jack London, I believe. "You can't wait for inspiration, you have to go after it with a club."
I live by that quote. It's very rare that I have any inspiration at all when I sit down to write. I figure if I wait for inspiration to strike, I will be waiting forever
Motivation is a bit different, I usually am motivated to finish things, to get projects done. But right now I'm losing it.
Don't feel so qualified, don't feel like I can get anything to work. My motivation is leaking.
Sometimes you just have to force yourself to sit down and bleed. Sometimes that's the only way to get past all of this.
Well, should be editing my story now. I didn't wake up at 5:30 this morning to sit around listening to music and only think about writing.
Last Summer I made a promise. I made a promise to a friend to write her story out. God had given me the story I needed to write out what I wanted to say to the world.
I lost communication with my friend last December. Never heard back from her.
Over the months, I've developed the story I had, and now it's become the story I've been writing for NaNoWriMo. Part of me is screaming to give up, because no one will understand it, or at least no one will find it interesting.
All last week I was worrying about my WC. But finally I've set my mind on just trying to get my story done.
Part of me wonders why I keep writing. Was thinking about my friend this morning. Read emails that were sent last Summer when I told her my idea. She was thrilled by the idea. But then again, it is pretty much her story.
I hate being that person who can't be counted on. Who will back out because they think no one is watching or caring. I hate being the person who will break a promise.
I don't know my friend anymore. I don't know what happened, for all I know she could have been lying to me all those months, and now is living like the devil. Or God could have brought her Home. Either way, I am sure she has long forgotten me. I don't know what happened.
All I know is that I pray for her every day. And I made a promise last year, and I will keep it at all costs.
I didn't want to write this story because I know that if I screw it up I'll probably give up writing. If I fail in what I want to say to the world, I might as well give up. I didn't want to write this story because I didn't think I was prepared to write it.
I need to cast all of those worries away. Not only will me writing this keep a promise, but it will finally shut the door to my past.
Sometimes I think that God gives each person something to say, or do in the world. Something specific, something that they can only do.
This is one of those things that I need to say to the world. And after I say it, the past to this story will be shut, and I never have to open it again.
I need to keep writing. This isn't about my Word Count any more.
This is about shutting a door. This is about keeping a promise.
It's been nearly a week since I've posted. It's been a crazy week, and I apologize to anyone who actually still reads this blog.
I decided that I might not post much in the month of November, due to the fact that for the first time I am trying out NaNoWriMo, it's wasted me writing wise.
I'll still post things, but an actual post might not come for a bit, maybe in December. Hopefully sooner though. Who knows.
Trying hard to finish my novel, not just to say I won NaNo but to actually say I finally finished something. And if I think it's worth reading, then I'll try and get it edited well, and sent off to the publishers. Hoping it will turn out alright, because a lot depends on the outcome of this.
But off to finish it now. Hope you are all having a good November!
I apologize for procrastinating until Monday to post this. Originally I was going to post on Friday, but time slipped away.
So I finally finished up a series that I have been in the middle of for nearly five years. I worked on things in between and procrastinated a bit, but I finished it. Finally, I am free.
I can't believe I am done. Finished Friday afternoon.
It was rough, because I didn't like the plot or anything. People kept telling me to stop it, give it up and move on. That's what most people do.
I couldn't have felt right doing that though, so I went on. It was hard, but it was worth it. After all of the time and energy I put into it, I finally completed it.
For once, it feels like, I completed something--not exactly that I can be proud of, but something that I can look back at and tell myself as a writer, when I feel like giving up, "Look, you finished that series. Those might be some of the worst story ideas ever written and completed, but you've finished it. You can finish this too."
I can't tell you how good it felt to finally close my document and write out the date when I officially finished my series.
For that feeling alone, it was worth finishing.
But now I've got to decide what to work on next. It's a hard decision, because whichever story I choose, I am going to have to complete it. I have to work on something at least till November ((NaNoWriMo)).
I finally decided after a few conversations with a friend, and lots of prayer, that I would dive into a certain dark story. Won't say what it's about just yet, considering it's not a full idea yet. It has a dark theme, a theme that isn't often dealt with.
This next month I will develop it, but I won't get to actually write it till sometime next year. So now I have two stories with difficult themes coming up.
And I think for these two stories I am going to try my hand at Epic Fantasy.
It's a towering thought, and I might fail a few times at first. But I'll finish these stories, unless I die or God has something physically/mentally happen to me that won't let me write.
But always, I am glad that I can finally look back at my series, and know that I can finish anything if I put my mind to it.
Been really discouraged lately as a writer.
Seems like the writing circle that I am apart is becoming oneof the most clique groups of all time. You have no idea how sick and tired I am of reading about dwarfs that all act like Gimli, the wise, good dragons, and of course, the majestic elves.
Why in Christian Fantasy must it be so clique? We all read from Lewis and Tolkien and try and base our style off of them. Because that's all we read! We don't bridge out, we don't read tons of other secular books that are actually well written.
Now don't take this the wrong way. I'm not trying to encourage you to go read a bunch of secular crap like Twilight. I'm only trying to encourage you to look at unique books like Terry Pratchett's and Brandon Sanderson's, who don't fill up their space with crap but do have a unique stories, and original voices. Instead of looking at secular books with such a negative eye, look at them as a way to bridge out.
Don't be afraid to bridge out. Don't be afraid to break the rules of POV or character. Sometimes a story requires that. Don't be afraid to try something new, that no one has tried before.
It might work. You'd be surprised.
Often I have wondered why I generally prefer secular books over Christian fiction, and now I finally get it.
It's not unique. Mostof the write styles are all the same. The themes are always about faith or leading their MCs to Christ. It's so clique. Perhaps I am the only person who thinks that way, or at least isn't afraid to tell anyone about it.
Look, if you are a Christian who writes fantasy, I just want to say, don't be afraid to go all out. Don't be afraid to try something new in your books.
Maybe you want to write about an extreme subject ((that no one seems to deal with in books)), try it anyways. Don't let what's already out there hinder you in any way.
It feels like so many Christian fantasy authors don't try too hard in writing. A lot of them seem to write the same. But I know they can go harder. They can change their style, make it into something that this Christian fantasy genre has never seen before.
You canbe unique. Just stop looking and following after everything that is out there. Work on making your style unique and plot creative.
If we don't start doing this, we'll never get out of this ditch. This is the only way that this genre can make a comeback.
For the most part in life, people are going to give you their opinion in what you do and what you say. It's good to listen, and consider. But sometimes you just have to ignore what they say and keep going.
Many times in the past, I have gotten caught up in what people say to me, at least concerning my writing. I've heard so many authors say that you can't write well, until after you are done with college, and have lived a bit longer. I've also heard from quite a few authors that you will spend your whole life trying to find your voice in writing. I've heard that young people can't write, because they don't have enough experience. I've heard pretty much everything that would hinder a writer from doing what God has called him to do.
I don't have the most encouraging of people around me, but that's alright. It doesn't mean that I should halt everything and just strictly wait till I am a better writer. You get better at writing by writing.
I've been waiting a long time to write the story that I think God is calling me to write. And now that the time is drawing near, part of me is tempted to be stressed out. And yet the other part of me is shouting just to go on, and ignore what people say.
Sometimes you just have to risk it, sometimes you just have to keep going.
And in this situation, instead of taking everything step-by-step, right now, I just have to charge. If I go step-by-step, I will break, I will listen to all of the lies told to me. Right now, I just have to charge through, and trust God that it will all be alright, and that He will give me the strength to get through.
I'm so close to being done with the series I am writing. I just finished the second book in my series. And for the first time in my life, I have ended up with a novel!
Now let me make it clear, I've been writing for four and a half years, it's not like I have only finished one of two books in my life. Whenever I write it always turns out to be a novella, not quite a novel, and not a short story. Just in the middle.
My first drafts usually turn out to be novels, but when I go back to editing them it turns out to be a novella.
So it's exciting for me that I've actually gotten something longer than my other projects.
Anyways, this week I've been thinking about writing, probably more than I should have.
One more book in the series, and then I am finished forever with that series. Lord willing, I can move on to more important projects.
It's exciting for me, but at the same time I find it discouraging. Discouraging because I am not as good of a writer that I should be--I don't feel like I can go on to bigger projects because I'm not good enough.
See what I mean? I've been thinking too much about it this week.
The plain and simple fact is is that I will never feel qualified or ready to write something meaningful and important. The plain and simple fact is that I just have to keep doing one thing, and that is to write.
I just need to write.
As a writer, there is a time to think about these things, and there is a time to just write. Right now, I just need to write. I need to stop thinking, and just write.
So I just came up with the most ingenious plan for my writing.
I have officially accomplished all of my goals for March, and I was considering making goals for April. The only goal I have for April is to finish reading Calvin's Institutes, which I have about 300 more pages left. This will definitely be a challenge.
Anyways, I came up with a brilliant writing plan for this year. This is how it will go.
I. I am going to spend at most, two months editing AD.
II. Then over Summer I am going to write the last book in the series: DVSAD.
--Not going to have a whole lot of time to write this Summer, so I am at least going to finish writing the first draft.
III. After Summer I will spend the rest of the year editing DVSAD.
And then I will be done! Officially I will be finished with the DD series. And I can finally move on to bigger and better projects.
Now, I will write about something that I was thinking of this week.
I was talking to a friend this week about Christian fiction. I told him that most of it was clique, and the writing was mostly the same. He argued that it wasn't and that it was unique.
This is something I would argue till death about.
I have read quite a few books that would be labeled Christian Fantasy. Most tend to be the same. Their writing style is almost always the same, there isn't anything unique about it. Their stories are about characters who either are in the real world, and somehow get into a fantasy world, and go on a quest and become a "Christian" on the way, OR it's about a character who is already in a fantasy world that must go on a quest and on their way becomes a "Christian".
Sometimes there are stories where the characters are already Christians but they must go on a quest, and it changes the person so that they will have more faith, or that they won't be so selfish.
I wouldn't mind if some people did those stories, but the problem is is that almost everyone is doing them.
The Christian fantasy genre has become so clique these days.
There is only one author who has broken that flow, but I would never recommend his books to you or anyone else.
Something is wrong with this. Terribly wrong.
The one man who has broken the flow and come up with some great plots and has a different writing style is a heretic. And the others who have decent theology are just going with the flow and don't care if their stories are clique and if their writing isn't much better than a kid in High school.
I know young people who can write better than some published Christian authors can.
Do you see something wrong with that?
Maybe people are aspiring to be too much like the successful authors of this genre. They aren't looking to be unique. If you want to glorify God in writing, and if He has given you the heart and talent, then you better be ready to push it for all you're worth.
Christian Fantasy has grown so pathetic.
Who will break that flow?
May God raise up men and women who will break that flow.
Alright, I wrote this piece in October of last year...so I don't have much of an excuse of why it's written so badly.
Anyways, you can say whatever you want about it, and I won't get offended. Criticism is always motivating and helpful to me.
So here goes.
"Savee stepped forward, her small bear feet walking upon the air rather than the gray dirt. Her long dark gray hair fell to her mid-back. The same shade of gray was the gown she wore, swishing around her ankles at every step she took. The same shade was also the color of her eyes. And though gray seemed like a stoic color, one could not miss the dreadful despair in her eyes. Her soft features were melted into a hopeless expression.
With her long fingers she touched the tiara on her head, it was silver, but what was that anymore? Everything was gray, how could silver be much better?
With a sigh Savee walked through the garden. The dirt, the rocks, the bushes and plants, the flowers, the trees and even the chattering birds were all tainted gray. This is the world that she had created. This is everything that she had ever wanted. All of her dreams and fantasies had ended up in ruin. They had all cast her into a dark world. This is where it all led her. Why didn't it make her happy?
Savee smiled slightly seeing a brilliant flower stretched towards the sky, above its companions in a strong attempt to get sunlight. Its gray petals extended to every side, Savee lifted a hand, gently touching the petals. Suddenly the flower began to tremble, shaking like it had been hit by a storm; it crumbled, first the petals and then the entire stem. It all crumbled to a pile of dust scattered below Savee's feet.
She let out a deep sigh. One that she had been holding in for much too long. This always happens...She thought, whatever I touch dies, withers, crumbles.
Looking up at the world around her she paused. Everything was gray. Dark gray. There was nothing there. Nothing that wouldn't disintegrate with her touch. There was nothing to make her happy anymore. It all escaped from her grasp.
"I have nothing," she finally whispered, suddenly understanding what she had done. "Every blessing that the Almighty has given me, I have destroyed with these...these," she paused looking down at her shaking hands, "these hands, these fingers."
She wanted the world the way she wanted it. And this was where her free will desires had lef her. She let them pull her into a glorious affair only to have them abandon her.
"I--I don't want it anymore, Almighty. Take it away. Please--please take it all away. i don't want anything to do with what I have created. Take me away from this--this hell, Almighty." she begged, her voice trembling.
Tears welled up in her now-green eyes. Guilt swept over her like a shadow, capturing her soul in a nightmare. Then a light flickered inside her, warming her ice cold soul. At the same moment rain began to fall, sprinkling down on her. Splattering against her face, the red instantly returned to her cheeks, splattering onto her hair making it oak brown. Splattering against her skin painting it tan.
Color.
Savee opened her mouth, catching the rain drops. She laughed. Something she had not done in so long. Suddenly the rain began pelting down from the gray sky, making her dress turn to a forest green and cherry red. As it hit harder the plants sprouted up, turning green, the flowers blue, red, orange, and yellow. Brown to the trees and sunset pink to the blossoms.
Colors that she had never known. This was life.
Tilting her face upwards she laughed gleefully, raising her hands up to the heavens and spun. Her dress whirling in ecstasy as she cried and laughed. Tears ran down her cheeks, blending with the rain drops. No longer in bondage to her desires, no longer a slave.
She was free."
This isn't really an interesting post but on Friday, I am going to post something I wrote a few months ago. Maybe that will be a bit more interesting for you. That is, if you enjoy criticizing bad writing it will.
Anyways, this has been a great month, writing wise. I finished typing out Iceblade (Part one of AD) onto my computer, and this week I have been working on the outline for the last book in my series. Lord willing, today I will finish writing out the outline. And then I think I will go edit Iceblade, and then type out the second part of AD, and then edit that. And then finally after all of that I am going to reread both parts and make sure that it all flows one last time before I put it away for good.
So I have been thinking a lot about my writing lately. And I realize that I need to figure out how to get to the place God wants me to be as a writer. I feel that God is calling me to be a writer, and I know what He wants me to write, but I can't write it until I finish my series.
I am hoping that by then I will be a good enough writer to actually sit down and write that book.
And now that my series is coming to a close, I realize that I am still not the writer I should be.
Everyone always says that I should take classes to become a better writer.
But I have taken classes, and they haven't helped me at all.
It was like whenever I enjoyed what I had to write, my teacher didn't like it and gave me a bad grade. But when I played by her rules I couldn't stand my papers. And I grew frustrated, because no one ever gave me any good advice on how to become a good writer.
But one day I was at dinner with my older brother who writes scripts and does filming. He told me that I should write what I want to write, and I should write how I want to write. Not what and how everyone else wants me to write.
So I took that advice and I finally embraced the freedom of writing.
But I am still left with the problem of writing.
I like writing like the "Epic Fantasy" way, that the authors do a lot of world building, and get into the characters' heads. I absolutely love that writing, but some people don't like it because it has a lot of run-ons.
But that's what makes it good! Because you are getting the characters so much in depth.
Some people just don't understand it.
And then there are authors of suspense novels, and they tend to have a lot of fragments in their writing. But that's what makes it good!
Some people just criticize those authors for that. Some people just don't understand.
And so when people tell me to play by the rules of grammar and spelling, I agree to an extant.
I agree to the extant that everything should be spelled correctly and that there should be good grammar in the book but when people get into the run-ons and fragments I would disagree at times, depending on the book and genre.
And here is another thing--I want to break into Christian Fantasy. I can't really take any good advice from that group, because the majority of people all write the same exact way. And most of their books are about the same exact things, with the same exact theme. I mean, if they their writing isn't bad, their theology is! You can't have two in one it seems for Christian Fantasy at least.
That's got to change.
I read book from that genre strictly for reference, of what not to do. And half of the secular fantasy books I read because they tell me what to do.
I can't seem to win either way.
So now I seem to be at a crossroads.
Two years ago, around this time I was reading a whole lot of books on writing, and copying pages and quotes from those books down, and my writing greatly increased. I still have those notes. And a few months back I would read through some of my favorite books and write down notes about the structure and craft of the story. That helped a lot too.
So here is one thing that I have considered doing--is reviewing all of those notes I have taken long ago and applying those things to my writing.
That would surely help.
And the second thing I could do--that I have heard so many authors already say is that I should read a lot.
I believe it was Stephen King who said, "If you don't have any time for reading, you don't have time for writing."
The writers who I respect most say that I should read a lot. That will help me with my writing, no doubt about it.
And then, most importantly, I need to write, write, write. I should be writing more. I don't write that much, at most, an hour a day. I won't get anywhere with just writing a few minutes each day. I have to keep going at it. That is how you get better. By writing.
So there are three things that I have considered. Now trying to think of more things to improve my writing.
But for now I will just put those.
Now, one last thing before I end for those who are a bit depressed that I didn't post anything meaningful today.
This is a video by one of my favorite preachers, Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones.
Great video where he talks about George Whitfield's life. He did live a truly incredible life. Just watch and you will know what I mean. Even if you don't know who on earth either of those men are. Maybe this video will inspire you to listen and read more of Lloyd-Jones' sermons and read more of Whitfield's sermons too.
Both men were greatly used by God.
Alright, this isn't going to be much of a post, but I reassure you, I am going to post something spiritual on Monday. I promise. Just hold on.
Now, I don't usually make goals for months, but I am going to make one this month, becuase otherwise I won't get much done.
So here we go.
I. Finish first edit of Iceblade ((the first part of AD, the story I am editing right now)). Which isn't very far in the big picture, but this week wasn't all that great for editing. At most I only edited a fight scene, and a part where I introduce the Iceblade to my characters. So, those were important parts, but such a drag to get through.
Anyways, I need to finish that soon.
II. Finish reading Holiness by J.C. Ryle.
I need to finish it becuase I have been in the middle of it for...a few months actually. Have 8 chapters left, I believe. It's an excellent book, whether you are Calvinistic or Arminian, it is a fantastic book for both groups. Ryle presents a lot of deep subjects to think about, it's an excellent book for every Christian.
III. Finish reading the section 'The Knowledge of God the Redeemer' in John Calvin's Institutes.
Which is a little less than 200 pages now. Gives me a little hope, but it's still a lot to read.
I say that becuase I am lazy, and don't spend all that much time with dead guys anymore. Which is really bad, becuase I need to start hanging out with them more. Have a lot to learn from them.
IIII. Finish the second WoT book, The Great Hunt.
I have a little less than 200 pages on this one too. Except it's much easier for this one, because I don't have to use so much of my mind and be so focused. It's Epic Fantasy, that's why.
Anyways, those are my goals for this next month. And I promise you guys, I will post something spiritual on Monday. Hope that all of you have a fantastic weekend!
It's rare that I will ever name a random piece of writing, because I can never think of a good name.
Even for some of my stories, like the last one I wrote, I left it as "Turk's Story" because I couldn't think of an official name.
I am not that creative!
Anyways, I am going to post something that I wrote in May of last year. It is not my best writing, but I am going to post it to prove that I am not that great of a writer to a friend of mine. I told her that at the beginning of the week I was terrible at it. She said I can't say my writing is bad, but once you read this you will agree with me. =P
Anyways, here it is.
"I hold the gun. There are six of us. This is the last of our trials together.
I aim the gun at Tony. I have never seen him so scared, his knees are trembling beneath him like an earthquake. I pull the trigger, the gun clicks.
Tony lets out a gasp and stands frozen, staring at me in unbelief. I aim it at Serah, she is nearly in tears. I pull the trigger and the gun clicks.
I aim the gun at Sue, tears are welling in her beautiful green eyes. I barely manage to pull the trigger, but I do. The gun clicks. She collapses on the ground, sobbing, and Serah bends down to gather Sue in her arms.
Three of us left...but not for long.
I point the gun at Bernard, his eyes are frozen on the gun. The trigger is pulled and the gun clicks.
Tim and I are nearly sweating now, as our eyes meet. I can feel the rest of my gang's eyes on me. I am their leader.
Tim slowly nods at me in reassurance, reminding me of my duty as their leader.
My hand trembles as I point the gun at my faithful friend. I pull the trigger and the gun clicks.
I hear a gasp from Sue.
"No, don't do this, Allan!" Serah cried.
But no one moves. We are all frozen.
In silence, I look at Tim just in time to see a tear streak down his cheek. I have never seen him cry, nor shed a single tear.
Hand trembling, I raise the gun to my now open mouth. The gun feels cold in my mouth, my throat is tight in fear. There is no time for goodbyes.
I pull the trigger, the bullet fires."
So there you go. Now you will let me say that I am a terrible writer. =P
Anyways, hope that all of you not-so-faithful followers have a wonderful day!
This week has been the best writing week of the year so far. Logically, it shouldn't be, not at all. It should be one of the worst. There are two main reasons why this week should not have been my best writing week.
Because:
I. I can't stand the story that I have to edit. It's terrible. I wrote it a year or so ago. Do you know how much my writing has changed since then? A lot. It's a drag trying to edit all of this. And, plus, I never knew how long it was till now. I might be half way done with it and it already has nearly 20,000 words. None of my stories are supposed to be that long! And this is part I of the entire story, and I thought that the second half was long. I have never made it to 50,000 words after editing and cutting. But maybe I will this time. Who knows.
II. Because the weather men lied to me. They said we would have a big rainstorm today. And at 7 in the morning I wake up and it's as sunny as it can be. Surprise, surprise. Now it's almost 10 and it's as dry as it can be. There goes my inspiration. So much for the rain in South CA. I should know better than to get my hopes for rain.
Those are two very good reasons that I shouldn't be inspired. And yet, I had a fantastic writing week. Figure that. Maybe it's because I only give myself 40 minutes to write, and I want to finish this story. It seems that whenever I wake up at 5 do my stuff, and then sit down at 8 to write an hour, I write less then, than I do when I wake up at 7 and give myself 40 minutes to write. I still don't really understand that.
Well, next week probably won't be any better. I need to get this story finished, at least the first half soon. Maybe I should just wake up at 7 every morning till I get it done?
I don't know. Depending on what happens today, I will decide what I will do for next week.
Other than trying to edit AD, the second book in the DD series, I have to work on the outline for the third book in the DD series.
I wrote the ideas sometime last year, and I have almost no direction whatsoever in making this outline. And I need to do it soon. So I have that to think about as long as editing.
I usually love outlining, but right now it's tough, becuase I am not sure how to approach it.
Might consider using the Snowflake method. Anyways, there's my writing life right now.
So two things I have to figure out this week:
I. How to approach my outline for the last DD book.
II. Figure out when to wake up.
Sad thing about myself, as a writer. Some writers are most inspired in the afternoon, or at night, or at odd hours of the morning like 2 or 3. I write better in the morning, any time in the morning really. Except not at 12--4, because if I take a "new" medication that I am on the night before, I am totally out of it by 12. So, my only option is to wake up early and write.
Sad, I know. Wish I would write better in the afternoon or at night. But that's just how I am.
"I write when I am inspired, and I see to it that I'm inspired at nine o'clock every morning." --Peter DeVries
That is a quote that I should live up to. Except it should say 8 o'clock every morning. =D
Well, I am sure that I just bored you to tears about my life as a writer. I will stop now, for your sake.
When I told my friends I was making a blog, I said I was going to post some of my writing. So I will keep that promise. My one writing goal for this year is to finish up my DD series. And I am calling it my DD series, but I don't want to say the whole long name.
Anyways, I still have to finish editing the second book in the series, and then write and finish the third one. So far, I am half way done with the first part of the second book.
See, my books in this series, have two stories in one. I know it's a bit complicated, but it makes sense if you read it. So that is my writing goal this year.
After I finish that, I am going to work on a story that I plan on getting published. I don't want to say anything about that story just yet, maybe once next year rolls around, and when I am done with the DD series, I will tell more about it.
But for now, I will just post a poem that has to do with the theme of my story. I wrote this last year, so it's not my best poem, but it goes with my story. So here goes.
"Who will stand when they come?
With their sweet lies and testing tongues
Who will be swayed by their persuasive lips?
Do you know where they come from?
They rise up among us
In the church, in the pulpit,
For themselves, they take the glory,
From the Lord Most High.
Dare we be led astray
Whern it feels so right
But the truth is so far away
Who will stand?
Who will be faithful and defend
The hope that is within you?
There will be no defense
if the sparks do not erupt
from the fire of your soul
Do we look at the truth,
Or do we suck in the words so smooth?
Without understanding we are lost,
Carrying a false light
Without study and heart,
we will fall into the darkness of night.
Who will stand if we cannot bow our hearts, stand firm
And face those fiery darts?"
