So Close

I'm so close to being done with the series I am writing. I just finished the second book in my series. And for the first time in my life, I have ended up with a novel!
Now let me make it clear, I've been writing for four and a half years, it's not like I have only finished one of two books in my life. Whenever I write it always turns out to be a novella, not quite a novel, and not a short story. Just in the middle.
My first drafts usually turn out to be novels, but when I go back to editing them it turns out to be a novella.
So it's exciting for me that I've actually gotten something longer than my other projects.

Anyways, this week I've been thinking about writing, probably more than I should have.
One more book in the series, and then I am finished forever with that series. Lord willing, I can move on to more important projects.
It's exciting for me, but at the same time I find it discouraging. Discouraging because I am not as good of a writer that I should be--I don't feel like I can go on to bigger projects because I'm not good enough.
See what I mean? I've been thinking too much about it this week.
The plain and simple fact is is that I will never feel qualified or ready to write something meaningful and important. The plain and simple fact is that I just have to keep doing one thing, and that is to write.
I just need to write.
As a writer, there is a time to think about these things, and there is a time to just write. Right now, I just need to write. I need to stop thinking, and just write.

God Bless,
  A.W.

Great Song

No matter what I'm doing, or how bad or tired I am feeling this song will never cease to put a smile on my face.
Found out about it from always listening to James White's Dividing Line.

God Bless, 
  A.W.

Every Morning

Every day, every morning we are faced with the question: Will you waste this day or will you live for Him?
Every morning after a rough night where you are struggling and at times, falling, you are faced with the question.
How will we live our day? Will we be sulking around in failure and guilt from what happened yesterday, or last night? 
That's not how God wants us to live. Yes, He wants us to repent, but not live on in guilt that tells us that He will never forgive us!

1 John 1:9
  "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

He promises! Right there! He will forgive if you really mean it. He means for us to have sorrow over sin, but not to the point that we are wasting our lives in a spiritual depression.
Each and every day, whether we had a good night or a rough one; we are faced with the question each morning: 'Will I waste my life or live with all of my might for Him?"

God Bless,
  A.W.

How Do We Look at Them?

Last night I went to a friend's church, and I saw a girl who I had grown up with. I didn't recognize her at first, but I thought it was her. I asked two of the people I was with if it was her. They said yes in a quiet tone, still not looking back at her.
I will call the girl "Jenny". After graduating early from high school she totally rebelled against her parents and left home. That story is all to familiar to me. I don't need to describe the terrible things that she did while away, because I am sure that you can imagine what happened on your own.
She came back home a month or so ago. I asked her why she came back, she told me that she didn't leave on a good note, so she wanted to fix that. But just because it might sound good doesn't mean that she's truly repentant or a Christian. Only God knows the real reasons she came back.
When I first approached her, I asked her what's new. She proudly told me about all of her piercings and her tattoo. How worldly were all of these things. It made me sad.
After a while of talking, we went back into the group of people to talk about things we are working on as a Christian. And she talked a lot.
Her talk seemed like she was a Christian. She said she was working on things. She wrote Scriptures down and said that she should read them. But that's just how she was before in church.
It felt like she had put on the "Christian" mask again. But only God knows her heart.

Then I met her boyfriend, he wasn't friendly. In fact, I haven't met a whole lot of people who don't even want to meet you. He kept touching her--it made me sad because she thinks that there is actually something meaningful between them. But he just wants one thing from her.

Later my friends asked me why I talked to her, as if she were such a terrible person that they should stay away from. I was saddened by my friends' response to her.
Just because God didn't let you or me go that far that we go and get drunk at parties doesn't mean that we were any better than her. God could have let you go as far as she has been going. Maybe He did, maybe He didn't.
Just because we never did some of the things that Beth has, doesn't make us any better or holier. God could have let us. And at least, knowing my own heart, I would have gone as far as she did if God didn't save me. I was no better than she is. I was just as dirty on the inside as she is.
All of that makes me think how often we do that? Not talk or want to be with a person who has a terrible past. Do we consider ourselves better than non-Christians are?

I know that if at least she is going to church, there is hope that God will save her. As long as she is doing that; there is hope. There is always hope.
What my fear is is that as Christians, we don't want to reach out to her. We know what she has done, we know how rotten her life has been. We are no better! Just because God has saved you makes you no better than them! It's only by God's grace that you are not like that! Only by His grace!
There are thousands of "Jennys" at our churches. There are thousands of people with terrible pasts that we refuse to reach out to. We were no better than they are. We were just as dirty and rotten.
We must reach the "Jennys" at our churches. And we will not reach them if we refuse to even speak to them, or even look. Are we reaching them? Are you reaching them?

Four Kinds of Freedom

"1) If you don't have the desire to do a thing, you are not fully free to do it. Oh, you may muster the will power to do what you don't want to do, but nobody calls that full freedom. It's not the way we want to live. There is a constraint and pressure on us that we don't want.

 2) And if you have the desire to do something, but no ability to do it, you are not free to do it.

 3) And if you have the desire and the ability to do something, but no opportunity to do it, you are not free to do it.

 4) And if you have the desire to do something, and the ability to do it, and the opportunity to do it, but it destroys you in the end, you are not fully free—not free indeed.

 To be fully free, we must have the desire, the ability, and the opportunity to do what will make us happy forever. No regrets. And only Jesus, the Son of God who died and rose for us, can make that possible. If the Son shall set you free, you shall be free indeed."  --John Piper


God Bless,
   A.W.

What It Does Not Look Like

This is what 'Living not a moment wasted' does not mean.
It does not alone mean to study your Bible for hours upon hours each day. Nor does it mean to pray for hours and hours each day, or evangelize or teach the Word because it's what God has called you to do.
If you do those things alone, as a duty, you will waste your life.
The things that we do shouldn't be a duty for us. Studying God's Word, evangelizing, teaching, and praying are nothing without a heart of passion.
You can fill up your days all you want, but in the end, if you don't have passion, then all of that was a waste.
Sometimes I sit down and read a theology book, sure I am reading it, but my mind is only half focused. Half focused on the book and what it is trying to teach me, and half focused on worldly things.
How much do you think I am getting out of a book when I read like that?
Not much. Not much at all.
Yes, we are called to study God's Word and to pray, and in and of themselves, they are wonderful things to do. My point is that without passion and a heart to do it, you'll get no where.
You can fill your day up with good works all you want; but in the end, it's just as bad as sitting in front of the TV all day. Without the heart for whatever you are doing, it will do you no good.
'Living not a moment wasted' does not mean filling up all of your time doing good works.



God Bless,
  A.W.

He's Dead

He's finally dead. Osama Bin Laden.
What could this mean for America?
This is a victory, but I'm sure the Terrorists aren't happy. In fact, I guarantee that they are going to get us back hard. That's a terrifying thought.
This year will be the 10th year anniversary of 9/11. Who knows what they could be planning for it? Or if anything at all?
May God have mercy on our disgusting country. Even though He's already given us more than we've deserved.
Pray for our rotting country, because we need it more than we have ever needed it.

God Bless,
  A.W.